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new life

my new life consists of yoga, karate, crochet, 2 jobs
i have a pet crowntailed betta named Aspen
i have a supportive environment
and an independant spirit
I think im going to try out for a poetry slam team
which means i need to take my writing to next level

Step by Step Day By Day

I start a new job today. I have a bunch of anxiety surrounding it. The only thing I can do is show up on time and do my best. That is also true for the life that I'm living. I've started a whole new chapter in my life. I'm going to turn 21 in May. I am an adult and I can make my own decisions. Plus I have all the support i need to make decisions that are right for me. All I have to do is show up and do my best in every situation and trust in God to do what he wants with the out come.

Money Matters

I developed a bit of a spending problem over the holidays. I overdrafted four times and now have locked my debit card in a drawer away from myself. I have cash in my purse so I don't know why I keep swiping away. I am trying to sell my christmas cards as well as my poetry cd's. I am having minimal if any success. I don't know how to self- market especially in the middle of a self-esteem crisis. I took the week off from work and now in a couple of hours I will be going back to work and I'm excited haven't been there in a week. I work Xmas eve and Xmas day. This is the first year that I plan on celebrating christmas so I'm excited.
-S

Progress

I have started to meditate and pray daily. It has helped a lot with my stress level. My job is pretty stressful but everyday I become more of myself and more of what I want for my future. Trabajamos soy pero mejor manana. I also realized that mental and emotional progress is hard to measure but I communicate more efficiently than slamming doors and pushing people away. I am starting to believe in a better tommorow. My indecisiveness and my reliance on others is still very great and I need to learn how to take care of myself and my own needs. To identify what those needs are and really work on that. I don't really know if I'm getting better but I'm getting different. I'm becoming more aware of myself who I am... and I like that. I am in the self-discovery portion of being twenty-something. The graphics for my poetry cd are done and pretty soon I will have fifty copies. I'm excited about that.

Reclaiming my day

A lot of what I am working on is being proactive rather than reactive.
A person can say something or do something that ruins my whole day.
I don't want other people to have so much power over how I feel and how the rest of my day is.
I choose this to follow no one but God. To have my mood not altered by random events and random people.

Goals to accomplish B4 Christmas

1) record poetry cd
2) 50 copies of Cd
3)achieving and keeping a healthy weight
4) get and keep a job
5)dealing with depression or anxiety
6) try new things like swimming, biking, skiing
7) take a class ( free school or Denver Open Media) Learn a new skill.